We have talked about adoption over the last several years, but never more serious than "maybe someday, after our kids are grown". But then one day I was perusing a local Christian bookstore and one book jumped out at me - Adopted For Life. I picked this book up and skimmed a few pages into it and then came the proverbial 2x4 to the head:
I don't know who you are reading this book. Maybe you're standing in a bookstore, flipping past these pages. Maybe you're reading this book a few minutes at a time, keeping it in a drawer so your spouse won't see it. Maybe you never thought you'd read a book about adoption. Maybe you're wondering if you should.
That got my attention, since I was reading this in the bookstore and also trying to hide that I was doing so. I skimmed another few pages and got another whack on the head:
But this book is also, and perhaps most especially, for the man who flinches when his wife raises the issue of adoption because he wants his "own kids" - and who hates himself a little for thinking like that.
This was exactly the way I was feeling (which is why I was even hiding this book from Cristy). I didn't buy the book, but I decided to look in our church library to see what books on adoption were available. The first book to come up was this exact book! I thought to myself, "OK God, you want me to read this book." So I checked it out and read it with Cristy (instead of hiding it in a drawer!). It's message is about how we who are Christians have all been adopted by God the Father through Jesus Christ and thus adoption of children is a reflection of God's adoption of us.
This book really challenged and convicted me that I have been viewing adoption as a second rate option, a last ditch effort, only for those who were desperate. We have fertility issues, but the doctor is sure he can fix it with medication. I had felt like to adopt would be to close the door to having biological children, but this book challenged me to reconsider my thinking. I realized I had been putting my trust in man (the doctor) instead of God! After much prayer and thinking, I came to view pursuing adoption as opening another door for God's blessing of children. In essence, I realized that God is sovereign not only in the number of children, but also in the way they come. So I am certain that He is at work in all this.
So at this point, I was firmly convinced that we should pursue adoption (Cristy was already ready before I was!). So, the next step was figuring out what to do next. We (I mean Cristy - she is excellent at research!) found that there was to be an adoption information meeting nearby. We went and got some information about the adoption process in our state(at least for public CPS based adoptions) and local agencies. After looking through the agency profiles, we found a great Christian agency (they actually describe themselves as a ministry that focuses on adoption/foster care, rather than a "faith-based agency").
So we have been busy for the last several months taking the required training classes and getting minor repairs done around the house (I've rewired the garage to remove some old extension cord "wiring"!). We're getting close to the end of the process - only a few more things to go. Hopefully we'll have a placement as soon as the first of the year!
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